flower girl

Mamiya RZ & Fuji 3000b

Val Part IV (living with dying)

Part I (relapse)

Part II (biopsy)

Part III (radiation)

This is part IV. 

Terminal.

 Living with it, the good, and the bad, and the marvelous life of Valerie.

It's been a long road for her. This cancer of Valerie's has a 100% mortality rate within 8 years. It is coming up on her 8 year mark this May. We are blessed to have drawn the longest stick possible on this one. 8 whole years to love, enjoy, appreciate, learn, and grow.

We are blessed.

We flew back to the states to visit her over the holidays, knowing it could be her last and fearing it would be her last. So home we went. 

What is life like for Val at this point, at this stage of the cancer? "How is your mom," everyone asks. "She's good!" I say. Because she really IS good. She is happy, she is sure of her future with Him, she is confident in His plan. She is enjoying her children, and grandchildren eating them all up, every last drop, like her favorite peach slump ala mode. She is amazing in every sense of the word.

But what is life REALLY like for her? I mean she has cancer, so she is in a lot of pain. ALL. THE. TIME. she has pain in several places throughout her body. Lately it hurts to swallow. This is a frightening development. As eating is something that one can never live without. She sleeps a lot. somedays ALL DAY. Somedays, only HALF the day. She manages with a pain patch, worn daily on her shoulder, full of Morphine I do believe. It makes life manageable. And so we wait. We don't know how much time there is left. She has already beat so many odds. And so we are grateful.

Merry (late) Christmas to you

stone cutters made them

Sonja & Annabella

Soni-bears and Annabella-button. 

Inseparable since the day they first became aware of each other. Sonja must have been two-ish and Bella was one-ish when they really started hitting it off. It's hard to say when exactly that day of solid, undying, forever-loyal friendship actually happened. Like sisters, they grew up right along side one another, and one day they were just completely intertwined. And now on the cusp of teenager-hood I can hardly believe my eyes, how these two darling (once very chubby baby) girls have grown into beautiful sweet young ladies.

The Pacific North West

TACOMA

SEATTLE

HOLGA + KODAK TRI-X

ELLIE

This is Ellie. She is 17 years old. She is the 4th of 5 children. She is a Special Olympian (she won a bronze medal.) Sometimes she is shy. Sometimes she is loud. Sometimes she is silly. She is always brave, except when there are spiders.

Ellie is my cousin.

 I remember the day she was born, we were so excited. A few days later I saw her at her house, such a sweet and beautiful baby. But even more vividly I can recall a few days after meeting her, I came home from a night out (I was in high school at the time) and my mom asked me to include baby Ellie in my prayers. She was in the hospital having heart surgery. I wasn't known for my praying back then, but that night I prayed hard and good for my tiny cousin. Ellie has been battling heart and other health issues ever since. (Including 4 open heart surgeries.)


Ellie likes books, jokes, puzzles (holy smokes she is a puzzle whiz!) And she loves her friends: Garfield, Clifford, Piglet, and Dashal Robert Parr. She sleeps with them and drags them around the house. They watch over her as she eats breakfast. She loves the "funnies" and asks her mom to get her glasses so she can read them to her.

Ellie doesn't do all that other stuff that 17 year old girls do. I don't know why some of us have to lead difficult lives, but what I do know is that Ellie teaches me. Every time I see her, I see her light. It radiates from her. She reminds me why I am here. She reminds me what is really important. 


"Ellie is the toughest girl I know, every year with us is a gift. It's been a tough, difficult road, but we would do it all again just to know her"~Ellie's mom